Do This, Not That

New York City is filled with things: things to do, things to see and things to own. It's easy to find yourself spending more and more, in an attempt to participate in all that NYC has to offer. What I've learned (or what I'm trying to learn), however, is that living in the city is not one big race to see how much 'culture' you can swallow in a day. It's not about seeing every new art exhibit that comes through the five boroughs. It's not about trying out all of the restaurants within walking distance of your home. It's not about having playbills from every single musical, T-shirts from every concert at Madison Square Garden, and ticket stubs from every movie to come through the nearby theatre. There's a lot to get out and do, it's true, and paying NYC rent to sit at home all day would be a colossal waste of money, time, and life in general. But taking advantage of what is available in NYC should not be accompanied by the anxious feeling that you haven't seen enough, haven't done enough, and, whether we admit that we feel this or not, haven't bought enough. We still have to work, we still have to study, and we do, albeit unfortunately, still have to sleep. Maybe one morning you'll go for a run by the Hudson, and then return home to spend the afternoon studying. That's a day well-spent. Another day you'll make breakfast, pack lunch for work, and then grab dinner with a friend at the Met, after checking out a temporary exhibit. Taking advantage of the "things" in NYC is a matter of moderation, not a game in which contestants must grab as much as they can in the shortest amount of time. This will only leave 'winners' with an excess of information, and a deficiency of funds.

Living in the city is truly amazing, and entirely possible to enjoy without entertaining a constant state of anxiety and debt! Below I've listed some of the financially problematic temptations that I've come across while living in NYC, and solutions for achieving similar experiences without the 'aftertaste' of an empty wallet. I have found that these alternative activities are enjoyable, fulfilling, and relieve me of the worry that I'm not 'doing enough', or 'living enough' in such an incredible city. If you think of other activities or purchases that often draw your eye, please feel free to leave a comment below.

Do This, Not That

What you want to do: Go to a fancy restaurant with friends.
What you should do: Host a candlelit potluck.

The best thing about going out to dinner isn't the food (although that's certainly a part of it), it's your dining companions. The best dinners I've had in NYC are the ones that I've prepared with friends. You can host a dinner potluck-style and have each guest be in charge of one item, or you can make a group trip to the grocery store, split the cost of ingredients, and cook the food together. If you're preparing the meal as a team, this is a great opportunity to try out a fancy recipe that you wouldn't otherwise make. Not only is it more affordable to split expensive ingredients, but it's also much more efficient to make a meal when there are more than two hands chopping up all the goods.

Light some candles and put on some music (I recommend songza.com, a website that categorizes playlists by the genre and activity that it accompanies, and then plays them without any commercial interruptions), and you've got yourself a fancy night for a much better price.

What you want to do: Buy a delicious-looking $6 slice of Magonlia Bakery's German Chocolate Cake, and then consume it in your apartment while watching reruns of Mad Men.
What you should do: Make a cup of tea.

I won't deny that Magnolia's German Chocolate Cake is delicious (if not a little too sweet). If you're splitting a slice with a friend while discussing who is the Carrie and who is the Samantha of your friends group, then it might not be a bad idea. But buying a slice just to bring home and eat alone? Not worth the money. Don Draper requires your full attention, and you cannot be expected to focus both on him and chocolatey goodness. Make a cup of tea, add some honey for the sweetness your craving, and lose yourself in the trials and tribulations of advertising firms in the 1960s.

What you want to do: Spend the night bar hopping with friends.
What you should do: Split a bottle of wine and have a board game extravaganza.

There are some great happy hour specials that you can find in the city if you're craving an evening out with your friends. But once those happy hours end, drinks in NYC get real expensive, real fast. Rather than spend an electricity bill's worth of money on a few drinks, why not split the cost of a trip to the liquor store, and spend the evening with a game of Apples to Apples? Drinks are much cheaper when you buy/prepare them yourself, plus you won't have to scream over the radio/television/rambunctious visitors from Jersey (I'm just kidding New Jersey, we're all just bitter because your rent is cheaper) to talk to a friend who is sitting right across from you. I've written about board games before (I suppose I'm kind of a board game advocate), because I'm convinced of their power to entertain without breaking the bank.

What you want to do: Go shopping.
What you should do: Clean out your closet.

Chances are there are things in there that you don't even remember wearing. There are also probably things that don't fit, things that you no longer find appealing, and things that you've forgotten about but really love. Cleaning out your closet comes with both a mental and economic reward—you'll feel super accomplished (and a little less claustrophobic), and you'll also be armed with unwanted clothing that you can sell at a nearby consignment shop. Equipped with the cash from your clothes and the knowledge of exactly what is in your closet, you can now determine if shopping is still as mandatory as it originally seemed.

What you want to do: Embark on your daily morning trip to the closest coffee shop.
What you should do: Buy a coffeemaker.

Trust me, I know that brewing coffee at home isn't nearly as enticing as sipping your favorite brew amongst fellow coffee connoisseurs, accompanied by that carefully crafted coffee shop playlist. But that daily habit is expensive. Two to four dollar (depending on your preference) cups of coffee add up when purchased five or seven days a week. Instead, try recreating that coffee shop vibe at home. Pull up the NY Times website as your coffee is brewing. Check out playlists like this one to enhance the atmosphere. Pour the joe in your favorite mug, and enjoy the fact that you can have coffee in your hands without having to take off your pajamas.

What you want to do: Take a cab, it's late.
What you should do: Grab a friend and take the train.

Don't take the cab!! It's nighttime (or technically early morning), you're tired, and you know it's going to be a long wait before the train arrives. Too bad, take the train. I have succumbed on more than one occasion to the promise of a quick and easy trip home. The result? Standing outside of my door realizing that I just spent $20 on what could have been a $2.50 trip. Not worth it! If you know you're going to be out late, plan to make the trip home with a friend. Or stash a book in your bag. If you're worried about safety then have someone walk you to the train, but it's been my experience that the subway is often transporting more riders than you'd think for such a late hour. If you don't want to deal with the long wait for the train during late-night hours, make plans for a location that's within walking distance of your home. Cabs are just too expensive—it's really not worth it.


What you want to do: Sit at home, feeling sad that you can't spend money.
What you should do: Go for a walk.

You live in New York City—so your apartment is probably the size of Harry Potter's cupboard under the stairs. And if your apartment is anything like mine, that beautiful view of NYC that you imagined seeing out your window every morning when you first decided to move here? It's probably been replaced by a view of the alley between apartment buildings. Or a street level view of the butcher across the street. But maybe that's just me.

Going for a walk is one of the simplest ways to fight boredom, without spending money. You can walk along the river, walk through a park, or just walk around the block of your neighborhood. There is so much to see in NYC that you are guaranteed to spot something worth your while. You can spend your walk noticing things you haven't noticed before; let's face it, when was the last time that any of us looked up? NYC has some of the most interesting architectural designs in its historical buildings, modern skyscrapers, and newest developments. Just make sure to bring your focus back down every few seconds, so you don't wind up face-to-face with an angry New Yorker hissing about tourists and spacial awareness.

Candlelit dinner- shrimp and kale salad

The people I've met here in New York are without a doubt more important to me than all of the frozen yogurt at 16 Handles, the french fries at Shake Shack, and yes, even the chocolate at Max Brenner. That fact would be true whether I lived in Kansas City, or New York City. You might not have the biggest apartment, the fanciest clothes, the newest computer, or the highest paycheck—but if you've entered a few new numbers into your phone that you know you can call up at anytime, then you're definitely taking advantage of what NYC has to offer.